“When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.” ~African Proverb
Do you ever look at people who are successful, healthy and happy and wonder what their secret is? Why you can’t be like that?
After more than a decade long struggle with emotional eating, depression, and low self-esteem, I realized that the reason I couldn’t be happy like the people I envied was that I didn’t love myself.
For me, developing self-love has been profoundly healing. I can hardly believe how effortless it has been for me to quit overeating, exercise daily, attract a loving relationship, and have the career of my dreams.
Nowadays, people come to me for counseling, convinced that they’re hopeless. There’s no way they can learn how to unconditionally love themselves! I meet people who say they envy that I love myself, since they’re too messed up, worthless, unattractive etc. to be loved. The reasons they believe this vary greatly, but the common ground is that they were made to feel unlovable, unaccepted or worthless in the past and feel too low to recover.
You may recognize yourself in the following stories:
- How can I love my fat body? I hate it.
- I was abused as a child and told I deserved it.
- I do so much to please others and they do nothing in return.
- My dad said I wasn’t smart enough to amount to anything so why try.
- I’ve been put down by my family since childhood. It’s too late to change that low opinion I’ve had drummed into my head.
- My first real love criticized me non-stop and I can’t let go of feeling I’m not good enough to be loved.
These messages leave a deep imprint and you probably developed habits, automatic responses of the mind, that correspond “I’m unlovable” “I don’t matter” to yourself and the outside world. You may be in the habit of eating too much junk food when you feel bad, criticizing the things you do wrong, ignoring your positive assets, always saying yes to others, or staying with people who treat you poorly.
You deserve so much better!
Now, it’s true that these habits can’t be changed overnight, but with patience and consistency you can reprogram yourself and develop true unconditional love and acceptance for yourself, as the imperfect person you (we all!) are. Even if you can’t meet the expectations of others on a daily basis, don’t excel at anything or don’t look like a Victoria’s Secret model. Everyone should be treated with respect, understanding, love and acceptance. Including YOU.
Don’t fall for the myth that self-love is selfish; it’s not. In the end, the more you love and take care of yourself, the more you will have to give others.
In this guide “The 7 Habits of Self-Loving People” I will help you to:
- Develop new habits that will significantly boost your feelings and actions of self-love on a daily base
- Realize the importance of taking good care of yourself and your body, and how to bring this in practice
- Let go of self-talk, behaviors, things and people that do not serve you
- Understand why it’s so important to forgive yourself and not feel guilty about your mistakes
- Become aware of who you really are, how you feel and want you need
- ..and much more inside!
Take the first step towards learning how to love yourself unconditionally today!
The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. ~ Lao Tzu
tags: confidence, depression, self-help, personal transformation, applied psychology, self love, self esteem, meditation, self compassion, journaling, low self-esteem, low confidence, self doubt, self hatred, shyness, guilt, shame, insecurity, self confidence for women, self esteem for women, self love and self esteem, self love and acceptance, overcome anxiety
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